Grandpa - Talk to Me

I would like to have a conversation with my Grandfather.

But first, let me tell you a little bit about him.

He was a most gentle man. It is impossible to imagine him as a soldier fighting in the first world war, as a signalman and a member of his beloved 28^th Battalion.

He was a highly read man. A vast array of books covering diverse subjects, mainly nonfiction sat on his book shelves.

He was a school teacher who became an engineer and co-owner of a successful enterprise.

He was a most loyal family man, not only to his immediate family but extending to his sisters and his nieces.

He was a communicator, articulate and thoughtful but also an efficient user of the language.

He was an author of two books, including the history of the 28^th battalion which was re-published in the early 21^st century.

He had a sense of humour and could be delightfully self deprecating.

He was a devoted worker for legacy and tendered the individual memorials in Perth’s King Park of his fallen battalion comrades.

He raised funds to build a wing of the South Perth Hospital.

He married my Grandmother, a devout Catholic at a time when marriages of mixed religions were frowned upon.

He spoke fluent French courtesy of his Swiss Mother and his upbringing included time living in New York as a teenager circa 1912.

He joined the Australian Imperial Forces, lying about his age and when his intellect was identified during basic training he was offered Officer training. He refused, as the delay he believed meant the war would have passed and he would have missed out.

My memory of him was always one of a man who walked tall and proud, who looked you in the eye and spoke with the authority of carefully considered facts underpinning his opinion. He was highly intelligent and possessed a broad range of interests.

I would very much like to have a conversation with him now.

I would like to hear his view of world affairs, the so called threat posed by terrorists, the real impact of Brexit, the soon to be French and German elections and the rise of Donald Trump and all that means.

I would like the benefit of his calm considered and above all, experienced opinion which would be delivered based on fact based assumptions and with an understanding of people and their motives.

I would value his political take on what is going on in the world and why.

I would love one more conversation with Grandpa

Domestic Violence - Education is One Part of the Solution

I am about to write about a subject of which I have no personal experience, no exposure to, or at least no awareness of any exposure via family, friends, colleagues or acquaintances.

However, it stands to reason that at some stage, I must have, but have not been aware of it.

The subject is one growing in awareness, but still one miss understood by many, myself included.

What I do know is this is a soul destroying, life destructing, family deteriorating subject and 110 lives cease to physically exist each year, while countless other lives suffer lifelong trauma.

The subject is Domestic Violence.

In Brisbane on 3^rd May at 5.30pm a candle lighting ceremony will take place followed at 6 pm by the start of a 110 kilometre team relay, each kilometre symbolic of a life lost each year to Domestic Violence.

There are associated 3 k and 10 events from 6am on the morning of 4 May, coinciding with the conclusion of the 12 hour 110 k relay.

The event is to raise funds.

As important as raising funds is, I can’t help but feel raising awareness of this horrific act furthering education, and teaching empowerment is of almost equal importance.

I urge as many people as possible to come along to the candle lighting event, or join in the activities on the morning of 4 May.

More importantly though, I urge you to bring along your family, your children no matter what age. I encourage you to use this event as a means for having a conversation with your children about Domestic Violence and begin the empowering process to help equip them for dealing with this in their futures. Chances are many will be exposed to Domestic Violence, if not directly, then via a friend, colleague or associate.

Let us start to build the skills of empowerment so our children can join the movement to first slow the escalation of Domestic Violence events and then reduce and eliminate this horrific social disease.

Imagine bringing along your 6, 8 or 10 year son or daughter and explaining the significance of the 110 kilometres, or 110 candles. Enter the 3 kilometre event as a family exercise and talk about what domestic violence is and the options to address it should they ever be confronted by it.

Move forward to when your child is now 15 years of age and progressing through maturity. We can all remember our teenage years and the reliance we place upon our friends. Imagine your son or daughter becomes aware of bruising on the body of a friend, or conversation reveals violent acts in the home.

The education you provided your child using the Darkness to Daylight event as the conduit to do so, could easily result in them supporting their 15 year old friend to take action, seek support and to not be alone.

Empowering your children through education could literally save a physical life. Literally save their own life.

More details about this event can be found here:

http://www.australiasceochallenge.org/

My personal involvement is as a member of a team running the 110 kilometres.

We are also fundraising and if you can’t come down but want to participate, here is our fund raising link (feel free to select my name too - Colin Morley)

https://www.mycause.com.au/page/145827/qsuper

One final request, if you are out and about on the night of Wednesday 3 May, can’t sleep and want to do something or you like the idea of participating and supporting a great endeavour in the late of night or small morning hours, come on down to the Southbank Cultural Forecourt, look for the QSuper annexe/tent.

One more thing, feel free to bring me a coffee – Long Black please.

 

 

Truth Hurts - Lies Destroy

This is a story of deception, of lies.

 It is also a story of financial mystery, of attempted corruption and cover up.

Ultimately, it a story of the potential failure of the long term partnership of husband and wife as retirement dreams melt away.

Imagine the scenario of husband and wife raising children, working hard, schooling and caring for them as only parents can before sending them off in to the world as young adults well equipped for the successes that lay ahead of them.

It is now time to consider themselves, to prioritise themselves and plan their future.

With professional advice, they put in place a 10 year plan of saving and investment with the objective of retiring from active employment as at 1 July this year. They want to travel within Australia, spoil Grand Children, perform some volunteer work, play golf and study a passion.

Regular meetings with their Adviser confirm all is on track, a little better than expected even. The future is looking good indeed.

Move forward to a few weeks ago when “he” arranges a meeting with the Adviser to ensure all is in place financially for their 1 July retirement, their first such meeting in a little over two years.

“She" independently calls the Adviser and requests he not reference the balance of her superannuation account during the meeting, he asks why?

The Adviser is shocked at what follows, has that tight nauseous feeling in his stomach, his heart.

She reveals withdrawing some $200,000 from her superannuation without her husband’s knowledge and doesn’t want him to find out. She says it was to assist a friend and while repayment had been expected already, there s no doubt it will be re-paid. 

 

The implication reached from this conversation is the withdrawal was a lump sum but investigations show periodical withdrawals of between $5000 and $7000 with the most common amount being $15,000. This pattern suggests the loan story is not quite right.

Where have the funds gone and what have they been used for. Is it a loan or series of loans.

What appears certain is the dream of retiring on 1 July has evaporated and along with it, the glue of trust that underpins all relationships.

The Financial Adviser has informed her he cannot pretend the money exists. 

Financial Advisers are well qualified experienced financial professionals who on the whole do a great job and help clients fund their dreams. They are not marriage councillors or consultants about behavioural matters. Well, not until 2 pm on Thursday when one I know may well have to draw on such skills.

Whatever happens, this relationship will never be the same. It may be over, it may be stronger, just never the same.

 

 

W Day

So, I call myself a “writer”.

I am studying a Journalism Degree.

But I hardly ever publish anything or submit anything for publishing.

I write often but rarely complete the article, or what I complete requires more editing. I am too often distracted.

Today I am accepting a self-challenge.  Starting tomorrow, on each of the next 30 days I will write an article and complete to my satisfaction. I may not publish it, and I may.

 
I have no set agenda as to what I will write about, just a commitment to write about something, honesty and to complete what I produce to a level of satisfaction that I would submit it for publishing.

What I write about will be based on an idea I have, an observation I make or a matter I feel strongly about. It may be sport related, politically motivated, environment influenced or anything at all. It could be travel inspired, health, fitness, finance, investment urbane or diet related. It may be an interview and it might even be fiction. I will not be producing content with a market in mind; I will be creating the habit of writing, of collecting ideas, or researching content.

Tomorrow, I stop calling myself a writer and I will start to become one.

All Lives Matter

Can we learn retrospectively?

The world is changed. The permanence of this is unknown, as is the final landing place.

France, Belgium, America and Turkey are recent deliverers of shocking news of terrifying events – events that change the way we view ourselves, our environment, our futures. And many other events fail to capture the publicity they deserve.

I was doing some research this afternoon including reading several interviews with well known writers, some first published in the 1930’s.

One such interview was with Author William Faulkner published in the Spring edition of The Paris Review in 1956, written by Jean Stein

In the interview, Faulkner is quoted as saying

“No, only to repeat what I said before: that if we Americans are to survive it will have to be because we choose and elect and defend to be first of all Americans; to present to the world one homogeneous and unbroken front, whether of white Americans or black ones or purple or blue or green. Maybe the purpose of this sorry and tragic error committed in my native Mississippi by two white adults on an afflicted Negro child is to prove to us whether or not we deserve to survive. Because if we in America have reached that point in our desperate culture when we must murder children, no matter for what reason or what color, we don’t deserve to survive, and probably won’t.”

The full interview can be accessed here.

Esoterically Athletically – My New Approach to Training

New ideas can take a long time to germinate to trial and longer to reach execution.

I run differently now. I have a program targeting the Gold Coast Marathon in July, but I am not a slave to it. Why?

It was 3 years ago, either late July or early August. I had a coffee “date” with someone who among many things, is a student of esoteric living. In very simple terms, this includes, (and only includes) being honest with your feelings about everything, trusting these feeling and acting accordingly. It includes being “loving” to yourself, your body, to your being, and prioritising this as part of your daily life.

So, what has this to do with running training?  Keep reading, I haven’t gone mad. 

Our coffee (Peppermint Tea) ordered, I mentioned cycling 4 loops of Mt Coot-tha early that morning.

“Why four” she asked, “why not two”?

I stumbled an answer about 4 seemed reasonable adding some totally non plausible explanation.  

What the……….  Who does she think she is? Most people respond saying “wow” that is incredible but here is Ms Esoteric asking why.

It’s obvious - -  I did four loops because………. just because.

“Why push yourself to do four, did that feel hard on your body? She added

I stumbled again and quickly spurted out that it wasn’t hard and I wasn’t pushing myself unreasonably, I am fit etc etc.

I was incredibly unconvincing. I wasn’t telling the entire truth – the third lap was a struggle and I had to push myself and because it was so hard, I decided to do a fourth because that is what we athletes do. (But I didn’t share this)

Over the coming months and years, my Esoteric Student friend talked regularly about many things including treating our bodies kindly and lovingly. “Feeling into what are bodies are telling us”.  That more is not necessarily better and pushing ourselves physically is not necessarily sound.

I was largely dismissive of such an approach. I have grown up in a world of “no pain no gain”, “if it doesn’t kill you it makes you stronger”, “harder – faster – longer”, of course you have to train hard and of course it hurts. I grew up in a sporting household, a Physical Education Teacher Sister who played netball, tennis, cricket and softball and an Olympian Father where hard work was the answer to everything – toughen them up, train them hard.

Besides, what would Ms Esoteric know? How many Premierships has she been part of, how many times has she cycled the French Pyrenees, the Alps or dehydrated herself batting for 5 hours in the height of summer?

Training for the New York Marathon was hell – there, I have said it.

I followed a training plan. If it said run, I ran, the distance and time dictated in the plan, always, no matter what and did so often when in pain –  except when I was injured. When I recovered from said injury, I then doubled up my training sessions to catch up, that is until I was injured again. (looks like a repetitive cycle)

If the plan said run 28 kilometres I did, no matter how much it hurt. If it said run 10 k at an average of 5 mins 55 sec I did, no matter what muscle was straining, pain and all, often limping.

I am not saying every session was “hell” – just most of them.

But it was worth it. I ran the bloody the New York Marathon. I witnessed an incredible City from a unique perspective with a group of people from every point of the globe (55000 is a group).  I was the pretender in Brisbane team of amazing people all supporting and raising funds to support MND Sufferers and to contribute to finding a cure for the horrific disease that is MND.

But, in the back of my mind I knew I could not again go through the pain of a running training program, at least not without making some miraculous discovery of a miracle potion.

I thought about the “feeling” based approach Ms Esoteric had discussed with me. What was there to lose? Most of all, I could prove the whole “esoteric” thing to be rubbish.

You need pain to gain – you need to punish yourself physically, push yourself through the comfort zone to achieve physically – it is how it is and has always been.

For the last 3 months I have been following a training program aimed at the Gold Coast Marathon on 3 July – although I will probably only do the Half Marathon.

But I am not a slave to the program.

If the program says to run “today” I generally do. If it says run 10 k at 6.30 pace I may or I may not.

If I head out and don’t feel I am running “easy”, I stop after a few k, or slow down and see how that feels.

But also, if I get to 10 k and am feeling as if it all very easy and painless, I keep going. I am using the training plan as a guide while running a distance at a pace based purely on feel.

During the New York preparation, the most number of consecutive runs I completed without injury was 8. I realise that what I am about to say is tempting fate, but here goes anyway.  Through 56 consecutive runs to date adopting this new “feel” based approach, I have not suffered a single injury.

But what is extraordinary, I am running further, faster and more easily than ever. My “run to feel” approach has me running 46% further than the training program says to do, and at a pace that is 58% quicker. I have no stiffness the following day, no knee swelling, calf pain or hamstring tightness. My back is fine and even my shoulder is ok.

And, I am enjoying it – lots.  I look forward to my next run rather than dreading it.

My learning is, do what feels right and do what is kind to your body and your body will reward you many times over

It is just a pity that it took me 3 years to execute this.

Now, what is next? What else can apply this feel based approach too? What else have I learned but not yet executed?

Introducing : Fiji - Stronger than Winston

She is a very striking young lady, daughter of a Senior Naval Officer (Retired) and successful self employed businesswoman.

While living in London, she worked successfully in Investment Banking, and having recently qualified as a Freelance Journalist now works in Marketing.

What is known to all too few is a passion for Animals, a devotion to Family and a strong, extremely strong care for others including an in built obsession to think of others and put their well being and interests ahead of her own.

She is engaged a daily battle to just maintain a semblance of good health, living in a world where being 75% well is truly a great (and rare) day.

Over Christmas, along with a Girlfriend, a luxury holiday to a Resort in Fiji was booked for March. 

Then the cyclone hit, devastating much of the country, particularly the poorer outlying areas.

Many who know her on the surface, will be surprised to know what happened next.

I consider her a friend and have been granted the privilege of getting to know her well so to me, what happened next was of no surprise. I am proud to be her friend.

The following link tells a small part of her week in Fiji.

http://hailshealthyliving.blogspot.com.au/2016/03/fiji-stronger-than-winston.html